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21 Jul
21 Jul

Toxic Friends

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Recently we posted a blog on Toxic Bosses and the impact these situations have on our careers. The real impact is on our health, our relationships with our friends and partners. Toxic friends or toxic relationships can have an even greater impact on our careers, our network of friends and our health.

A friend is defined as a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, exclusive of family or sexual relations, a person who is not an enemy or opponent.

“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you” Hubbard

Some of our friendships started in the schoolyard, some have endured years of separation through lives lived on different sides of the world. Interesting friendships happen when two people who have nothing in common are brought together for a purpose, some last, others fade away after their season. It is the friendships that have been close, years of strong memories that can take on a different path way with pressure, that often become unfulfilling. Your friend attacks when you are vulnerable, bring you nothing but grief, drain your energy and embarrass you in social situations in order to gain your attention, they are overly demanding and selfish. This type of behaviour can creep up on you, eventually dominating the relationship.

Traits of a Toxic Friend

Bad Influence: They have you do wrong, make poor choices, encourage negative behaviour, or make bad decisions.

Insincere: Not honest in expression of actual feelings, hypo- critical, dishonest, and habitually phony or fake.

Selfish: Concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure, self-serving, inward looking, one’s own interests regardless of others, lacks consideration for others.

Different Values: Principles or standards of behaviour, one’s judgement of what is important in life differ, most common area is integrity.

Manipulative: Control or influence the behaviours or emotions of others for one’s own purpose, making you feel quality.

Demeaning: To lower in dignity status or character to degrade and conduct oneself in a particular manner be mean, have someone feel less respected.

Attention Seeking: Need recognition, selectively focusing on specific information or situation, prefer drama.

Negative Behaviours of Toxic People

  • Destroy your image
  • Drive you crazy over nothing or something small
  • Demean your value
  • Despise your dreams
  • Attacks you when you are vulnerable
  • Drain your energy
  • Instils fear
  • Demand love
  • Bring you grief
  • Absorb your valuable time
  • Criticise and put you down

Choose carefully those who you stay close too, if these negative behaviours are taking too much of your relationship time then take positive actions and put a little space between you.

Remember

You cannot change the people around you

...........But

You can change the people you choose to be around

If you're dealing with toxic people at work or in your personal life, Now Professional Coaching can help.  Call now for a complimentary coaching session.

02 Jul
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